I think I dont want to be alone~

I got Friends, A lot of it... here there and at many places^^
Im So Glad to hear that come out from myself..
But...
There's something i feel is just not right, I feel Cold, Not even warm...
There was a time I was Down, and I Called my friends, through internet, Message and telephone.. Nobody I could reach that time.. everyone was go Out and Im the one Who left Alone~ sounds So pitiful right, But i never feel that I need a pity...
That time I go Drive Alone at Night, The night Where I lose The One I loved. isnt that I wanted to lost her, but it was a hard situation... She ask me to and I cant be selfish.. I feel Im a glass that breaks and Shattered everywhere... Its almost impossible to arrange it together again. it tooks me 4 years to collect it but its still so fragile..
I need Someone to talk, or at least listen to me.. I know I got friends, but they was not there.. I was on my own Facing everything. I was lost dunno what to do, While I drive in a midnight i Looked at the sky running my hands through my eyes and say how can all the Wonders and Dream I built, everything I got that is Given for it. It was all Break... I put my Hope on the sky but even the sky falling down on me, put me on the Ground then Stomp on me...
I Ended up alone, start from that day, the next day, Another next day, the other next day and it happens like that everyday... Finally I can talk to my friends, But It doesnt help me. some of them taking it lightly, some of them angry at me because i was stupid they said. I know why the reason the said that, but i was hoping that they would say "Im understand.."
Nobody can Really understand me except me. that;s what appear in my mind That time, Until now... I got a lot of new friends, i hang out with them, but it is just me or is it the truth that whoever Am i with, I ended Up alone again again and again.. can u imagine U were with our friends, They are having a chit chat laughing but its only you who stay in the middle just stay there, nobody talks to you, nobody listen to you.. maybe they were see me but they didnt look at me, they heard me but they Didnt listen to me... feels like U just a Statue for rooms Decoration.. Lucky I got principle, I believe in me, I dont need to depends on them, i can do it by my own.. It was a hard time I try to pass through but Finally I manage to get up By my own, I oftenly got another new Friends, but i never think I had one True Best friend.. I think it was ok, Just be a Good One, and u will receive what u give... but Im Human, I want to receive something also... But i never had... I always ended up alone, After good Times, Bad times, Still I will ended up alone.. And I dont want to be alone...
I need Someone Who really cares
I need Someone Who Understand
I need Someone Who Always there For me
I need Someone Who Love me
I need Someone Who can accept me whatever I am is
As a Friend or more...
Im tired of being alone, I cant and I dont want to Purposely looking for attention
but then What should I do?
I choose to stay Be myself in any condition, But it's hard when U Dont have anyone really care to you...
If U have One, Or more than one.. Tell Them That U love them, Friends or more. Just tell them That U do.. Bcause out there lot of people just like me.. Ended up alone cant be The lucky one Like You do...

Well I dunno why I write this, Im still try to get through it the fact That I feel im alone..
But I try to be positive, look at another point of view that someday when I found that SOmeone. it would be One of the greatest moment of my life...
If U feel Like I do, Try be positive, keep on Believe... Whenever u are a falling down and u got no one to help there's still God Who always Love His Children. He wont let You down.. Be positive be a gOod, U receive what U give..

Just like this Picture, I was down on the ground without no one to help me Get up.. But I finally manage to get up pass by everything and I reach up the Mountain Top.. But once again Im ended Up Alone Up there...